respirations | ― open post.

[The restaurant isn't far. Richie should have known it would be here fast. He groans and lets his forehead fall against Eddie's.]

This is the worst timing. Fuck. Just. Hold that thought. And this position. And. Everything. Just hold. I'll... Yeah.

[He breaks away with a groan before going to get the food as fast as possible. He almost slides from the door back to the living room in his hurry. The bags go onto the floor in a heap.]

Okay. Alright. Where were we? Can we just pretend that didn't happen?

( Oh, okay, so Eddie didn't think he could be anymore red but Richie is bound and determined to prove him wrong. Even if his friend couldn't hear the sound of his heart, he has to be able to feel the heat and energy radiating off him now. )

Y-yeah, okay, sure. ( He murmurs and watches as Richie breaks away, hating it more than he cares to admit but unable to help chuckling as he almost busts his ass sliding back into the living room. ) Right, well—

( He steps in close again, more just pressing close than really looking for a dance as he glances up at Richie's face. )

We were at the point where I was going to ask you to go out. On a date, I mean if you want to— um— with me if that wasn't clear either.

[Richie's mouth falls open. Not because he's shocked although, yeah. Even seeing this coming it is still a little surprising. But really, it falls open because he's desperate to say something but his voice is just gone.

He gapes like a fish for a long second before his arms go back around Eddie and he can finally make out words.]

Yes! I mean, yes! It's clear you meant you. And yes I want to go out with you. Jesus fucking Christ, I've wanted to go out with you since I knew what 'going out' meant. I had like this notebook under my bed with a million different ideas about how to take you on a date without making it super fucking obvious. Like I could just trick you into dating me. Fucking stupid. Real stupid. But yeah. Yeah. Yes! Yes, date! Date with me! And you. You're definitely required. So yes, you and me. And...

[He steps back but takes Eddie's hand as he babbles]

You're hungry, right? We can go now. Let's go. There's a diner close which is good an- oh. Shit. We ordered food from there. But whatever! Uh. We can...save that? Or throw it away? Or fuck it, I don't know. Whatever. But we can date!

Shit. Okay. I might be messing this up...

( Eddie can only stand and absorb everything as it comes spilling out of Richie. He'd laugh, perhaps. Although he worries that Rich might get the wrong idea if he did and instead lets him run at the mouth to get everything out. It reminds him of being a teenager again, in a way, as Richie goes on and on which just equals to Eddie carrying the warmest, sappiest look on his face.

Eventually though he has to reach up, take Richie's face in his hands and shake his head in response to even the idea that his friend was somehow messing this up. )

Richie, Rich— nothing you could do would mess this up for me.

( He steps back then and lets Richie once again take his hands, squeezing them in a reassuring manner before making a thoughtful sound. )

Why don't we have a date here? A trial date, maybe? Because I'm like super exhausted from that flight and also I look like shit but you're deck is nice so... brunch date on the deck?

Okay. First of all? Fuck you. You've never looked like shit a day in your life. Even bleeding out and covered in grey water you were still obnoxiously attractive. It's like a fucking curse.

Second of all, yes. Yeah, that's a good idea. You just...

[Richie takes Eddie by the hands and leads him to the couch.]

You just sit. Or take your stuff to the guest room upstairs. Or whatever. Just. Let me take care of setting up the patio. First date. Holy shit. Yes. Okay.

[And with that and a sappy smile, he grabs the bags and takes off running to the kitchen to grab plates and glasses and various other things to make this brunch date perfect.]

Wow, okay, shut the fuck up. I looked like absolute shit with nearly everything inside me threatening to fall out.

( He's chopping his hand through the air as he says this, frowning but still following as Richie leads him over to the couch. Eddie doesn't sit immediately, glancing to his luggage and nodding. Right, okay— that was a good idea. )

I'll take my things upstairs. It'll give me the chance to clean up a bit, so uh— I'll be right back down.

( With Richie going one way, Eddie returns to his things and hobbles up the stairs with his suitcase. It's easy enough to find the guest room, breathing in a deep breath and setting his things down. Right, okay, he could do this— first time seeing your best friend in months and now you're going on a date. A date at his house, where he lives now too but a date nevertheless.

Thankfully its easy enough to freshen up real quick, washing his face and changing out of his plane clothes into something a little nicer. He even takes a moment to fix his terrible hair, breathing out another sigh and glancing himself over. He feels off, too skinny from recovery but hoping he doesn't look terrible. The shirt he has picked out hangs low enough on his collar to show the faint beginnings of his scar and Eddie can't help swallowing awkwardly.

Rich wouldn't care, he knows he wouldn't care but— )

Get it together, Eds.

( He whispers, shaking his head and heading back downstairs and trying to ignore all the nervous energy he feels coursing through his veins. Stopping at the bottom of the stairs, he glances around before looking to the open doors leading to the patio and peeking outside. )

Rich?

[Richie isn't sure how much time he's going to have so he moves fast. Or as fast as an old man like him can, at any rate. Still, he hustles.

The first thing he does is move the table closer to his pool. Scenery, right? He clears the top of it off with windex and paper towels because if anyone was going to notice the dust on it, it was gonna be Eddie. Even if his plan involved covering most of that table almost immediately, it was the details that mattered.

He put out place mats that he got from who knew where. The food all goes on platters and plates so that it is almost fancy looking. Richie arranges them like he's gonna take some Instagram photos and then rushes to get coffee, juice, and some candles that literally still have the plastic on them because he never fucking uses candles. Except for now.

When he's done Richie is almost panting with how much he'd been running around. But then Eddie was calling his name and nothing else really matters after that.]

Hey!

[He grins at Eddie and gestures at the table with flourish.]

Ta da! I can clean up for a date, huh? Oh, wait. Shit. Music. I should....

[He pulls out his phone and starts fumbling with it, trying to open Spotify and not have his embarrassing music blare out of it.]

Fuck. One sec. I have a playlist, I think...

( Immediately upon seeing Richie, Eddie can't help smiling at the sight of the other man and trying even harder to ignore how badly his heart is racing. He steps outside onto the patio with his head tilted upwards toward the sun before looking back to Richie as the other man gestures toward the table with a flourish.

It is really nice and he hopes that the warm smile on his face is enough to give that away as he approaches Richie. He's literally fumbling with his phone and Eddie hopes he doesn't throw his off even more when he steps in close, lifts up slightly on his tiptoes and presses a soft kiss to Richie's cheek. )

It looks perfect, Rich. Seriously it all looks awesome.

[The very expensive iPhone Richie owns immediately falls to the floor at that small kiss. Thankfully, he had the foresight to purchase an Otterbox for it long ago so when he scoops it back up between light curses, it is pretty much fine. Richie on the other hand is a bright shade of red and looking even more flustered now than before.

But he's smiling. So. There's that.]

Yeah? Yeah. I...uh. Yeah.

[He pockets his phone and smiles a bit goofily as he rubs at the spot Eddie kissed. It tingles.]

Let's. Um. Food, yes. Date. Oh! Let me...

[He rushes to Eddie's seat and pulls the chair out.]

Monsieur

( If Eddie was a lesser man then he'd probably laugh over the sight of Richie dropping his phone. After all it was something else to see Richie actually at a loss for words or doing something like fumbling his phone like he was a giddy teenager. Though, honestly, Eddie was just as giddy and there is color high on his own cheekbones.

It only colors his face a deeper shade of red as Richie moves to pull his seat out, chuckling but moving to sit. )

Ah, um— merci. ( He sits back, scooting in with Richie's help before glancing back over with another smile as his friend joins him at the table. ) I couldn't have imagined something like this happening today, you know?

You couldn't? Fuck, Eds. I was asleep like forty minutes ago and now suddenly I am on a date with my childhood crus-

[He freezes, not really wanting to get into all of that so soon. As always his mouth got him into trouble. Richie walks to his seat and sits down without really looking at Eddie just yet. He sips on his coffee and clears his throat.]

Yeah. I am pretty stunned by this turn of events myself. But it's good. Maybe the best surprise I've gotten in a long ass time.

Yeah, uh— I used to daydream about shit like this.

( His own dip into the truth even if it is all so soon. Ultimately, Eddie swallows and looks up at Richie will a smile. )

But I'm glad, really. I just don't want you to think that I came out here, showed up on your doorstep and admitted all this because you're some rebound or I'm some lonely fuck that's taking advantage of a friend.

[Richie snorts a laugh right into his mug.]

Eds. Babe. You can absolutely take advantage of me. Like, please. Whenever you want, I am ready and able to be used however you need. The idea that you would take advantage of me is more a fantasy than a fear so seriously. I'm not concerned.

[He smiles at Eddie warmly before giving him a wink.]

Now. Daydreams, you say. How about we keep talking about that?

( Once again, a flush of color blossoms onto his features before taking a long needed sip of his own coffee. )

I'm not going to take advantage of you, jackass.

( Still he smiles shyly, setting his cup down and reaching to start cutting into his pancakes. )

I mean it was just basic teenage daydream bullshit. I just really wanted to go to the movies with you and hold your hand.

[That is enough to have him calm down and give Eddie a smile that is all warmth and affection. God, he is such an adorable person. How did Richie ever forget someone as amazing as him?]

You're so cute. So fucking cute.

[He reaches his hand out over the table and wiggles his fingers at Eddie so he can take it in his own. ]

There may not be a movie playing but I can grant half of that wish.

I'm not cute, Rich. Jeez— I'm forty, you know.

( Still there is this flush of color on his face that Eddie wouldn't be able to deny. It lights up from the tips of his ears and falls all the way down to his neck. He can't help eyeing Richie as the other man reaches out across the table, wiggling his fingers and (at first) Eddie's only response is to swallow hard. )

Well, um— it's more than what I ever thought I'd get. ( It's said lightly, Eddie unable to help smiling as he reaches out and takes Richie's hand. It gets his heart pounding rapidly, a common theme of the day and he just can't help the rambling that follows. )

I thought about all sorts of dumb things, you know? Going to the drive-in or going and seeing the ocean together. Everything I wanted, I also wanted to do it with you.

And you are an adorable forty. The cutest forty in the entire world.

[Eddie's hand is in his own and Richie's heart is in his throat. He smiles wide though and strokes his thumb over the back of Eddie's knuckles. Over his bare ring finger. He gives special attention, there. ]

How were we both so stupid? I mean, you more so than me because I was fucking obvious. I was practically hanging on your side and pulling your pigtails since we were six. You didn't realize I was in love with you?

There's nothing cute about being forty.

( Still the feeling of Richie's hand holding his own is like a fucking dream come true. It is a dream come true and Eddie can't help as he continues to glance to their hands like if he looks away too long then all of this might vanish and he'll wake up back in New York. )

You were obvious; I was fucking obvious, man. I mean I found any excuse to try talking with you and I would just pick fights to get your attention. I mean why do you think I was always throwing myself into the hammock with you? So, yeah, we were both stupid and―

( And oh. So, yeah, he might realize just what Richie said and somehow his face grows even redder as he sits there, mouth open and fork full of pancakes. )

You were in love with me?

[Oh. Okay. That was... Yeah. Not what Richie had meant to say at all. Way to go, idiot. Just blurting out your feelings like that when you two are just getting to the point of holding hands?

Richie goes beet red and has to focus on not dropping Eddie's hand immediately, like it was on fire. ]

I... uh. Yeah, man. I was... Fuck. Okay. Yeah, I was in love with you.

[Richie looks down at his own food and shovels some eggs into his mouth. He can't look at Eddie as he says this. ]

And you weren't obvious. I just thought you were torturing me all that without realizing it. But yeah. I was kind of obsessed with you. Carve-your-initial-on-the-kissing-bridge level obsessed. Which might be a lot to drop on you right now. But. Yeah. Yeah, I was in love with you.

[He coughs and shoves his face into his mug so it will muffle him as he mumbles.]

Dunno if I ever really stopped...

( Perhaps sensing Richie's thoughts in the moment, Eddie squeezes his hand in hopes of both calming Rich's nerves and his own racing heart.

He listens quietly as the other man talks, fork still held in his other hand but unable to even think about eating when Richie was literally laying everything out in front of him like this. Although he had hoped to control his beating heart, all he can feel is it pumping harder and harder until Eddie thinks the damn thing might actually explode in his chest. )

I would never torture you. I just wanted you to notice me. ( He mumbles lightly, sadly as Rich proceeds to further blown the air out of his lungs. Even more so as he mumbles into his cup and Eddie is torn on just what to do. There is a million and one thoughts rushing through his mind before he finally breathes out and say: )

I want you to kiss me, Richie. Please.

[His head snaps up and Richie's eyes go wider than the entire table they're sitting at. Sure, he thought maybe this would happen at some point. They are on a date and they are holding hands and talking about liking one another. Surely they would at some point kiss. But Richie hadn't expected it so soon and he hasn't really convinced himself that this was all true yet.

But Eddie had asked him for a kiss and Richie, as always, is helpless to refuse him.

He gets up, still holding Eddie's hand, and walks around the table to stand beside the man he loves so desperately. His hands are trembling-- both the one that Eddie has and the one that comes up now to cradle Eddie's jaw. All of Richie is trembling just a little. His heart is going to explode inside his chest but at least he will die happy.]

You...You're sure? Please be sure. Because once I kiss you once I know I am going to want to do it again and again, as long as you let me.

( It's hard not to look away, face red and trembling slightly as Richie's head snaps up at his request. A part of Eddie is worried that it was the wrong thing to ask and that maybe Rich was having second thoughts about everything that had happened since he showed up at the other man's front door. It's only with a deep breath that he looks back, peeking at Richie and making another wheezed sound of surprise as his friend gets up.

He has to shift his chair in order to face him, looking up and visibly tense but it all seems to bleed out of him once Richie comes to cradle his jaw. God― this alone, he thinks, would be enough and he can't help nuzzling his face against the other man's hand with a sigh. This would definitely be enough but he was just so greedy, he wants so much more and― )

Yeah, I'm sure. I want this, Rich and I want it again and again because― ( And he breathes out, smile warm and his look soft. ) I love you too. I think I've always loved you.

[And that is all he needs to hear. Richie smiles with tears coming up in his eyes as he looks down at Eddie. He said that he loved him too. Richie tries to process that and it's almost too much for him. Almost too much for him to even believe. He'll have to deal with it later.

For now he just leans down. He keeps his hand on Eddie's jaw and enjoys the feeling of Eddie leaning into it. Just relishes the feeling of closeness for a moment before finally acting on every single fantasy he's had since he started puberty (and maybe a bit from before).

Richie leans the rest of the way and ever so gently presses his lips against Eddie's. At least at first. But then the reality of the kiss and the feeling of Eddie's lips against his own makes him press in harder and firmer. Properly kissing his friend as he had requested he do.

And if Richie has a tear or two leaking down his cheek during the kiss, well. That's his own business.]

( Once again there is a beat of worry that runs through Eddie in the silence that follows. He worries (as always, he fucking worries) that perhaps he had said the wrong thing and that perhaps this just wasn't meant to be or it was too much, too fast but hadn't they waited long enough? The clown had taken almost everything from them and he had almost died in that fucking cave, no― he had died, more than once but now he had this fucking second chance.

A second chance that he couldn't waste― not again.

Thankfully Richie leaning down is more than enough to bring him back into the present. His breath catches in his throat but once Rich kisses him? It's like everything finally made sense for the first time in his fucking life. For a moment, he can only sit there stunned but as Richie deepens the kiss its like being hit by a bolt of lightning and he moves to return it with just as much neediness.

It's a struggle but he pushes him up and out of the with his hand still holding Richie's own but bringing the other to wrap around his neck without breaking the kiss as he raises to his feet to pull them close together. )

[Eddie is standing and that lets Richie press against him in a way he's always wanted to. The arm around his neck is grounding and keeps them close. Eddie's body is smaller than his own but is so strong and warm. So alive. Richie breaks the kiss for a second so he can choke out a small sob that's half elated and half overwhelmed. He doesn't let the break last too long before he's kissing Eddie all over again. As long as he can before breathing becomes necessary. ]

Jesus...

[He sniffles hard and lets out a wet-sounding chuckle. He's smiling as he pulls back and looks at Eddie. And, yeah, he might be crying a little but whatever. It's either cry or have a heart attack so this is less dramatic.]

Twelve year old me is so jealous right now...

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