eddie "fuck you, bro" kaspbrak. (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
respirations) wrote2025-12-01 12:00 am
respirations) wrote2025-12-01 12:00 am
― open post.
voice strength: ★★★★★ shipping: i'm reddie trash but i'm also all about that platonic love with the other losers preferences: gen, smut, shippy, angst, au, cross-canon, slice of life. notes: for some fun starting points: some random assortment of memes and aus for days; feel free to go the other worldly route; also throw pics or random sentences at me and a kink generator because why not. hit me up for starters if you'd like. there's no crying in baseball but there is crying in my rp but let's have fun, ok. |
oops hit enter too soon
just being with him and having those arms wrapped around him helped him to forget about the bad and remember the good. remember everything good he had with the other losers and most importantly: everything good he had with richie.
his heart and mind are both struggling to keep up with the onslaught of emotions returning but if one thing made sense, it was richie. that's why it isn't a hard decision to kiss him like this, to nudge them closer toward the bed although there is a brief pause at the other's murmured words that just leave eddie smiling fondly. ❫
I'll be okay, Richie. ❪ he says leaning in and nipping at his bottom lip. ❫ I'll tell you if I need to stop.
❪ he smiles again because that's always been richie's way. those soft, gentle reminders. eddie never had to worry about if rich saw him as his own person because it was something he always knew. ❫
ugh relatable
and, besides, he's never been able to say no to eddie.
there's still concern in his expression, but richie's appeased for the time being. he knows that eddie knows his own limits well enough to tell him when he needs a break, and - unlike myra and mrs. kaspbrak - that's always been enough. ]
Yeah, yeah, okay. [ he concedes, his expression softening as he kisses eddie again. he follows the other's movement towards the bed, eventually pulling gently, as if asking through touch for eddie to lay down next to him.
it's the first time they've made out like this, alone in richie's room, and he feels like his heart's about to pound out of his chest. he loves eddie so fucking much it scares him; he doesn't want to push too hard, go too fast, do something to fuck things up.
but eddie is always willing to go along with it. for some reason that richie doesn't think he'll ever understand, eddie is always right there with him. ]
I love you so much, Eddie, [ he says, unable to stop repeating it. ]
no subject
he still feels like that kid standing at the end of his driveway watching rich drive away, partly sad for what they'll (what they had) missed together but hopeful for something better. they can't leave, no matter how much his body screams because he can't risk losing this again. he can't risk losing stan, the others and especially rich again.
the flash of concern on the other's expression earns him a small smile and he chuckles as richie leans in to kiss him again. he readily returns it, hands splaying out across his waist and wasting no time following the gentle pulls to the bed.
they lay together in bed a lot, he notices. not that eddie minds. they kiss, hold hands and spend a lot of time exploring one another which eddie can never get enough of. he loves the feel of richie's body under his hands and loves the reactions he can get out of rich when his hands dip over sensitive spots.
it's such an incredible feeling. he's never felt this way about someone and he doubts he ever will again. richie is literally everything, he finds and maybe that's unfair but he can't bring himself to even humor the idea of what if they weren't together one day. he's so in love that it makes him dizzy but—
but he's more than willing to fall down as long as rich is there. ❫
I love you, I love you so much. ❪ he repeats himself as if trying to make up for ever missed opportunity over these last two decades. ❫ I'm never going to stop loving you.
sorry for being such a slowpoke T_T ♥
this man is the most precious thing in his life. he always has been, even when richie didn't have any idea who he was. there's no way in hell he's ever going to let go of him again. ]
Eds, [ he murmurs, not really sure what he wants to say but feeling the need to say something nonetheless, ] you're so - I can't believe - I missed you so fucking much, Eddie, I love you so much. So fucking much -
[ ah, shit, there are the tears.
he sniffles and tries to discreetly wipe at his eyes, but his heart's about to burst. how many times did eddie need him over the years? how many times could richie have helped him if he'd been able to remember what they went through? as good as it feels to be back together, there's still so much pain in his heart that he can't ignore no matter how hard he tries. ]
Fucking -- [ he closes his eyes, presses his forehead to eddie's, bites his lip. ] Just - fuck, Eds, I don't wanna let go of you. I don't want to lose you again.
you are perfectly fine ♥♥♥♥
he does the only thing that feels right in the moment and leans in to kiss away at the tears that has appeared on richie's face despite the other man's attempt at discreetly wiping them away. it bring in more memories, more instances of their time together and that love and god— eddie wants to cry too. ❫
You already promised me that we'll stay together. ❪ he murmurs, hands coming up to hold his face and lips continuing to press small kisses. ❫ I'm gonna make sure you keep you're promise, okay?
❪ it's said with a small smile as their foreheads are pressed together and he looks up, seemingly searching richie's eyes. ❫ I won't let anything take you away from me again. I'm not just going to stand by and watch you drive away again either.
skjdhfskdhf ♥
This feels so right. They've done this countless times - almost daily, when they were in high school - and the quiet comfort it evokes in Richie's heart is just as potent now as it was all those years ago. After a few moments his tears subside, and for a little while he just lies there with Eddie, still in disbelief that not only did he forget all about this, but that he somehow managed to get it back, too.
Eventually, though, that nagging thought from earlier finds its way to his lips, despite his best attempts to hold it back. ]
Eddie, [ he murmurs, suddenly nervous, ] what about... what about your -
[ even saying the word is difficult: ]
- your wife?
♥♥
but, as it turns out, that's a little harder said than done. since they began this literal trip of memories, he hadn't given much thought to myra back home but now it's hard not to look at his wedding band. ❫
The longer I'm here the more I remember about my mom and the more I'm reminded about the relationship I have with Myra. I forgot and got myself involved with someone that does the same exact shit that she used to do. ❪ he chuckles but it's a sad sound. ❫ And I realize that the sort of shit that I feel with you, felt when we were together, I can't remember ever feeling anywhere close to that with her.